A last-minute option to play golf on St. Patrick’s Day landed Frank Wood, Global Traveler Advisory Board member, and me on Tatum Ridge Golf Links in Sarasota. I book through the GolfNow app but was told Teeitup had a better deal. The course was built in 1989 by Ted McAnlis, who designed many courses in Florida including The Preserve Golf Club at Tara in Manatee County and Pelican Pointe Golf & Country Club in Venice. In 2003 McAnlis received a 10-year prison sentence for tax evasion; he had not filed a return since 1977. McAnlis represented himself at the trial and said Social Security numbers were the mark of the devil. But I do hear he likes birdies on scorecards.

Tatum Ridge receives harsh reviews that trash the tee boxes and the weeds on the fairways. We encountered some casual water, though it had not rained in days. The clubhouse, if you want to call it that, is a glorified shack with a signup counter where the pro sits and a long snack bar with a server who could be straight out of a Seinfeld episode. We determined the course is an official “dog track,” even though Florida recently banned dog tracks.

We were paired with a couple of gents from Canada who shared their stories of being in Florida during COVID until the Canadian Government threatened to take away their health benefits unless they returned and quarantined. Both Terry and Dave were meteorologists retired from the Canadian Weather Service. All in all, I played well on the front, shooting a 38, and my usual self on the back, scoring a 47, so I ended up not disliking this dog.

HOLE 5
400 yards, par 4
This is the No. 3-ranked handicapped hole of the course — I suppose due to the distance, the water and trees. It seemed straightforward, so I teed up and shot a drive out to the right center of the fairway. Frank and the Canadians did the same, which made for some nice opportunities; some won and some lost. I nailed a rescue club to the green, allowing me yet another chance for a birdie putt. I walked away with par, and Frank with a bogey.

HOLE 6
493 yards, par 5
The course features a nice string of par 5s, and little did I know at the get-go I would par the first eight holes on the front — no birdies. Frank was increasingly impressed with my drives, which were straight and on line using my generations- old Ping driver. From the tee box I landed left of the pond and near a drainage outflow nicely lined with rocks, which piqued my curiosity, as this is exactly what we have been trying to replicate at our homeowners association. From here I hit a clean 3-wood to the right of the fairway and chipped up close enough to be within birdie distance … but missed the putt for a par. Frank had a few chilly dips and fol- lowed closely behind, while the two Canadian boys pulled out a Maple Leaf special, securing two pars.

HOLE 11
173 yards, Par 3
Having the honors, I stepped up and eyed the green, which looked a lot farther than it should have been. I swung as hard as I could, blading the ball into a pile of rocks. Frank then informed me I was aiming toward the wrong green and pointed to the green left, which was considerably closer. The gang allowed me a mulligan due to my strategic error, so I teed up again in silence and slammed another ball, a line drive to the rocks and water sur- rounding the green. The ball bounded and ricocheted about six times and came to rest on the edge of the green … to much laughter, particularly from the Canadian guys. I am sure they still tell this story to their friends in Ottawa.

HOLE 13
522 yards, par 5
This is the signature hole of the course, but that does not mean fewer weeds. It does mean there is water to carry, and you need to calculate exactly how far you can cut the corner for added distance without getting wet. I drove a great ball, my short-lived comeback after falling off the rails for a few holes. Frank slammed a smasher, but it turned a little right and landed by a tree obstruction on his next shot. When we jumped into the carts (I was driving), Frank tried to get a picture of an alligator he had seen earlier. Out of the corner of my left eye I saw something approaching the cart at breakneck speed. It was a Florida softshell turtle, more than a foot in diameter. I yelled and turned a little right, and Frank thought I was pushing him toward the fictitious alligator. The turtle ran under the cart and into the pond. It made for a Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom moment. Aside from this, I parred the hole while the Canadians wondered what the heck was wrong with us.

HOLE 15
531 yards, par 5
Hole 15 is attractive; and if you have not played it before, you should study the plaque, as the hole looks more intimidating than it is. It features an early dogleg left; from there it’s a straight shot into the tucked-in green on the right. As a significant trap guards the approach, catching anyone who lands short of the green, you need to hit a ball directly to the green; rolling up is not an option. I managed to secure another good drive and kept myself steady with the second shot within chipping distance. Frank had a nice drive but ended his second shot in the fairway bunker lining the left side of the fairway. We ended the hole with a par and bogey.

At the end of the game we said farewell to our Canadian friends, Dave and Terry, and sat at the snack shack to kick off St. Patty’s Day with a beer.